It seems now that I am at a point where the future of this blog is in question. It is clearly mis-titled in that I think I have found Lucy, and quite some time ago! I am also at the end of the transitioning side of my journey. Yes, there are more years of feminising effects from the hormones, but to all intents and purposes I am physically there with everything.
However, whilst I may have left my dysphoria behind now, I will always have a trans past and helping others is in my mindset. This means that I will probably continue to do my current work with the trans community. Blogging is one such way I can help people; by sharing my experiences I can reassure others as to how they can proceed with their own journeys.
Debunking bullshit is one such passion of mine. Recently I witnessed someone stating that they had been close to death on the table during their GRS and it took 2 hours for them to be revived. This same person was stating they were walking around the ward 24 hours after this event.
This makes me incredibly angry and the only reason for someone to post crap like this is for attention seeking. My fear is that people who may desperately need GRS to help with the physical dysphoria, may feel apprehensive after reading such a thing. We need to be mindful that there are risks involved with the surgery, as with any surgery, but they are not excessive. We also need to be reminded that the satisfaction rates (those that are happier with their lives) following GRS are as high as 97%, which is staggering compared with any other major surgery. When I hear someone spouting bullshit as severe as this, I feel I must do something to counter it.
My blog is one way I can do this. On here, you get the truth. Everything is a reflection of my own experiences and anything else is a result of serious research. When something is researched, I often say that is the case and often link to some of that research. Someone recently thanked me for what I had written about my GRS, on the eve of their surgery. They said it was a great insight and they didn't feel so lost. This made me feel very happy, that my words had helped calm someone down. This person reading that someone was near death might have been in a much worse position. I had very little to refer to prior to my surgery, but as a person, I was very calm and relaxed; even as I was being wheeled down to theatre. Even Liz Hills commented on how calm I was. I knew that was the best place to be in mentally but many are not so blessed with this kind of control.
We have the dilation myths and I recently wrote a long FAQ's about this process. I received a comment on Facebook almost immediately about how some found this a private matter. I responded saying that people must know about the ins and outs prior to their GRS because at the moment, it is all myths. The most common, and no one knows why this is, is that it takes two hours for each session. This is so prevalent, even I believed it before a friend proved to me that she could do it in 40 minutes including shower (no, I did not watch, I was just in her flat whilst she dilated in her bedroom). The longest I have taken for a standard dilation (2 dilators) was 50 minutes and that was the first solo dilation in Brighton which included a first time exploration as well as running and having a bath. I have since recorded 30 minutes including shower. Even the staff at Brighton know about this 2 hours myth, but seem unaware as to why it pervades the trans community.
So for the moment, I feel the need to continue blogging and spread truthful words. I have updates on my recovery and something else I want to do is delve back into the past of my transitioning, material that was on my old website. I really don't want it to become too mundane but may struggle to come up with material at times. When it does feel a struggle, I may have to think again about it all.